Our Heroes: Foster Dads

In honor of Father’s Day, we asked one of our Home Parent Dads in Harrisburg, MO, Aaron Vassar, to share his thoughts on being a foster dad. Following his story, please take a moment to read the tributes that each of our Home Parent Moms shared about their husbands. Happy Father’s Day to all the men who serve their families so well!

There are many things one can do to serve God. No one thing is greater than another if done out of a sincere heart, but one thing is for certain: caring for the orphan is directly aligned with the will of God. James 1:27 says, “Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.”  

Corrie Ten Boom, who is best known for helping Jews hide and escape from the Nazis, coined the phrase, “The safest place to be is in the center of God’s will.” This is true, but it is often misunderstood and taken to mean that following God’s will promises comfort. Jesus tells us that if we want to follow Him, we are to deny ourselves and take up our cross. Crosses are anything but comfortable.  

Aligning yourself with God and then expecting it to be easy or comfortable is as foolish as the soldiers storming the beach at Normandy on “D” Day in flip-flops and swim trunks, expecting to get a sun tan.

All of this is to say, being a foster dad is the hardest thing I have ever done.

But I can’t imagine doing anything else. Being in the center of God’s will may not be comfortable or easy, but it comes with a promise. God is omniscient and with all of us, but to those who are willing to step into the fire, He promises to be with them in a different way. God showers so many blessings on those who walk in obedience! Caring for the orphan is one of the many ways we can obey and follow His command to GO. This calling has been humbling and terrifying, but I believe that because of it, I get to experience God in an intimate way that many others do not. There is a reason that even with the atrocities of war, after soldiers return home they often long to return to battle.  

Our God is a Father to the fatherless.

That same calling is offered to the foster dad, though temporarily. It is said that people will subconsciously apply the attributes of their biological father to God. For the children who show up on our doorstep with their belongings in trash bags, their earthly fathers have obviously not painted a great picture of the Heavenly Father. As a foster dad, we have the awesome opportunity to change that narrative. We can show them that there are good men, and good fathers who will help stop the cycle of fatherlessness in their family chain.  

This ground will not be reclaimed easily, though. Without men willing to step in the gap and come alongside these kids, they will be left to fight that battle alone.  

There have been moments when my wife and I, with tears in our eyes, have said, “How are we going to do this?” Yet on countless other occasions, with tears in our eyes again, we have looked at each other and said, “I can’t believe we GET to do this!” 

Cliff Graham, author of the Lion of War book series, writes, “You will hear it said that I fight to live in peace. Nonsense. I fight so that our women and children can live in peace. You will always find me where there is battle.” The calling of being a foster dad is hard and painful, but even more so, it is beautiful, wonderful, and comes with a sweet intimacy with Jesus that I wouldn’t trade for anything. It is worth any wound that comes with it.

When Jesus returns, may He not find us with Cheetos dust on our fingers, idly watching Netflix. May he find us in battle, serving our King.

~~Aaron Vassar, Home Parent Dad in The Atherton Home 

This isn’t a dad bod, it’s a Father figure.

Watching Garrett be a dad to so many sweet children is the most amazing thing. The way he builds relationships with each child is so precious to watch. Garrett has grown so much in our time here. He was made for this. He has reminded me over and over that his heart is content because we are finally where God wants us to be!

It has been incredible to watch Josh be a father. He pours out love so freely, making everyone feel special and seen. I feel so blessed and honored to be his wife.

Kirkland is a very gentle and kind man. It does my heart good to see him connect in such positive ways with the kids at Coyote Hill Foster Care Ministries.